A Mother's Love
by Mr. Chaos
Summary: Takes place days after the movie. Despite Dil and Tommy coming to terms in the forest Didi and Stu still focus on the new baby, leaving Tommy feeling abandoned. But all it takes is one night to help Didi realize what she has done and how she and Stu have neglected Tommy. The question is can she earn back the precious gift that is her child's love?
1. Chapter 1

As she popped the two baby bottles into the little warming caddy that fit snuggly on what was her favorite sauce pan-turned-baby-formula-warming-pan, Didi Pickles was struck with the oddest feeling of wrongness. She remembered when she had been a young woman, before meeting Stu and starting a family, and she'd scoffed at her mother when she claimed that all women had a sixth sense when it came to their families. It was only now, with children of her own, that she saw the wisdom of her mother's words. How many times had she felt that something was up, something she couldn't quite grasp, but it would be wise to go and check on her little ones. She'd gotten that feeling only days earlier, when the babies had gotten stuck in the runaway Reptar Wagon and ended up lost in the forest. She could still remember the chill that had suddenly filled her soul while she'd been out and later cursed herself for not listening to what her instincts were telling her. Perhaps if she had...

No, there was no use dwelling on it. The babies had been found and were safe and that was all that mattered. Everyone was happy and healthy and things were back to normal.

"Blub! Blublubu!"

Didi smiled, looking over at the baby carrier that was currently sitting on the kitchen counter. "Alright, Dilly-willy, mommy hears you. I have a nice tasty bottle for you and one for Tommy... oh." Didi blinked at the empty high chair that sat at the table. She'd expecting to see Tommy there, the playful grin she'd come to love so much on his face as he waited for his bottle and then breakfast. But there was no Tommy... merely her youngest child and an empty seat. Dil gurgled in annoyance, reaching chubby fingers up as he grunted, clearly wanting his bottle and not in the mood to wait. "Okay, sweetheart, let me get it." Grabbing the bottle and checking to make sure it was just warm enough while also not so hot as to burn his little tongue, Didi clicked in approval before giving Dil his bottle and turning back to the stove. "I just don't know where my mind is today," she said to herself. "I completely forgot your brother. Poor little guy must be so confused... now then, let me-" Didi turned around, only to blink in confusion. Dil had already drained his bottle and was grunting again, reaching for the bottle she'd prepared for Tommy. "My, someone is hungry!" Dil's face crumpled, a clear sign that he was going to begin bawling. "Now now, Dilly, you already had your bottle and this one is for Tommy-"

The moment those words left her mouth Dil let out a high-pitch scream that would have rivaled air raid sirens. Didi did her best to try and calm him, coming over and shushing and cooing to him. Dil however was having none of it and violently kicked and thrashed, screaming his little head off.

"Someone's upset," Stu said as he entered the kitchen.

"Can you go get Tommy while I calm him down?" Didi asked over Dil's sobs. "I forgot to grab him and if he doesn't get fed we'll have two upset babies."

Stu, however, ignored her and walked over to Dil, wiggling his fingers at him. "Hey, champ! Why so upset? Is dad's one and only still hungry?" Stu reached over and plucked the second bottle from Didi's hand, handing it to Dil who happily began to tug at the nipple.

"That was for Tommy!" Didi complained.

"Dil wanted it," Stu reasoned. "Just easier to give him what he wants than deal with the crying. Besides, Tommy won't mind… Dil needs it more."

"He doesn't need it though, Stu," Didi said with a sigh, gesturing at the bottle that was still full, Dil merely giggling as he sloshed it around. "He's not even drinking it... it will go to waste!" She went to grab it only for Dil to yank it away from her, his face set in an angry pout.

Stu merely shrugged and went to start the coffee maker. "I'd say calming down our son isn't a waste."

Didi rolled her eyes. "Can you at least put another bottle on the stove while I go get Tommy?" She began to head out of the room only for Dil to begin screaming again, waving the still-full bottle about. Droplets of milk splattered Stu's shirt as he walked back over and moved to face his sobbing child.

"Think he needs mommy, Deeds," Stu said as he lifted the squirming upset infant up.

"In a moment, I need to get Tommy," Didi said, only to blink when Stu much too quickly darted around and practically thrust Dil in her face. "Stu!"

"This is important, Didi!" Stu whined. "He won't stop crying and he needs you! Tommy doesn't matter right now… Dil does!"

Didi almost reached out and took Dil but the earlier feeling, the one that said something wasn't right, began to trickle along her spine again. It was as if she knew she needed to be somewhere but an almost magnetic pull was dragging her back to the kitchen and to Dil. She felt that it would be easier to just give in and accept her screeching son but her gut was telling her to push on. She gently sidestepped Stu, Dil grabbing onto her shirt and tugging on it as she passed. Didi reached up and pried his little fingers away, a memory of another little hand holding her finger bursting into her mind. That was enough fuel for her to push on, ignoring Stu's pitiful demands that she take Dil off her hands as she made her way towards the living room.

"I am so sorry, Tommy," Didi said as he walked around the couch. "First mommy forgets to get you for breakfast and then your little brother won't stop crying... this has been a rough morning but I promise-"

The next words died in her throat.

Didi felt her knees tremble and her stomach lurch down to her feet. The world seemed to spin for a moment even as her upper body seized up and refused to move. She felt like ice water had been poured down her central nervous system. A new high-pitched whine filled the air and it took her several seconds to realize it was coming from her as she stared at Tommy's playpen.

The once carefully painted wood was chipped and cracked, looking more like a rotting fence around some abandoned lot than the sturdy planks that would protect her child. The little metal latch was rusted shut to the point that no amount of elbow grease would get it to move. Inside the pen the carpet suddenly stopped, the soft fiber ripped away revealing cold concrete without a single toy or block to give comfort and joy. Large cobwebs hung in the corner, creating drapes for the sole occupant in the miserable little cage.

Didi reached out, her hand trembling like a wounded dove. There, laying pitifully in the corner of the playpen, was Tommy's skeleton.

The happy eyes that had looked up at her with trust and love were replaced by empty dark hollows that stared out at nothing and everything. The wispy hair she'd love to stroke and the soft pink skin she'd blown raspberries on were gone, leaving only clean hard white bone. His head was tilted haphazardly to one side, Tommy's jaw hanging open with his legs and arms sprawled out. He was still wearing his favorite blue shirt and his diaper but both were threadbare and covered in crusty stains, showing just how little love and attention the precious life had received. The tiny little form lay abandoned and forgotten with only dustmites to keep it company, neglected even in death.

Didi felt herself moving towards the playpen but she simply couldn't touch it. Couldn't step over the fence. Couldn't touch... touch... it would make it real, make it true and as long as she didn't get near it then it wasn't real and everything was still okay and her miracle baby wasn't... wasn't...

She heard Dil crying somewhere behind her.

"Didi, come on," Stu said, walking up with the thrashing 3 month old. "Dil is really upset and needs his mommy."

The grieving mother turned, though only enough to stare at Stu; as much as she wanted to shut her eyes and look away from the little skeleton that was wearing her son's favorite shirt it felt utterly wrong to do so. He deserved that much. "Stu... Stu, please tell me this is a joke."

"No, Dil really is upset-"

"Not Dil!" Didi screamed, waving wildly at the playpen. "Tommy! Please tell me this is a joke! A sick, horrible joke! Where is he?"

"Tommy?" Stu looked at the playpen, staring at it with the same carrying one might give a tree stump that had been in their yard for years. "Oh yeah... been meaning to clean that up. Sorry Didi… Dil here just draws so much attention-"

"Clean... clean that..." Didi lurched forward, to do what she didn't know, only for the sounds of their friends' voices to fill the air as they walked into the house. Didi was suddenly of two minds: one half wanted them to leave now, horrified at what they might see what had become of her child, while the other half thought perhaps they would know what was going on and tell her where her precious Tommy was. Because he couldn't be gone. He just couldn't… "Betty! Chaz! Where is Tommy? Did he spend the night at your houses?"

"Tommy?" Betty said, scratching her check. "Tommy? No, he wasn't at our house."

"He's right there," Chaz said with a grin, pointing at the skeleton that was still laying there in the corner. The redhead turned to Stu. "I thought you guys were going to clean that up last weekend."

"I meant to but then I got focused on building a new toy and Dil was really upset so I had to play with him-"

"TOMMY! WHERE IS TOMMY?!" Didi screamed at her husband and friends, stopping their conversation. Even Dil piped down, looking at her in confusion.

"He's right there, Didi," Betty said, her tone the same as when she talked to Phil and Lil. "Now why don't you cuddle this cute little guy," she wiggled her fingers at Dil, who cooed in delight, thrilled he was once more the center of attention, "and let Stu and Chaz clean that mess up."

Didi felt white hot rage go through her. She wheeled on the three, screaming, "Mess? Mess? How... that... that's my son!" Tears gathered in her eyes, the energy she'd had leaving her as the reality of the situation crashed down upon her. "Tommy..."

"Didi, calm down," Stu said, setting Dil down before wrapping an arm around her as he tried to pull her away from the rotting playpen. "I don't get why you're so emotional... it's not like you really cared for Tommy-"

SLAP!

Didi's hand burned but she figured not nearly as much as Stu's now-red cheek. "How... how dare you! He was my son!" She looked down, curling her arms up to cradle an invisible bundle. "My baby...oh god, my baby...my little miracle…"

Betty's mouth quirked; it wasn't a smile or a frown... more of a 'uh, okay?' look. It was the look one would give a crazy person after they said that their favorite pudding flavor was 'toenail'. "I guess... but come on, Didi, it was real clear you didn't care about Tommy anymore."

"How... how can you say that?" Didi asked even as Dil gurgled at her feet, bobbing her shoes with his little fists.

Chaz looked sheepish. "Well... when is the last time you read to him?" Didi opened her mouth to respond only for no words to come out. She wracked her brain, trying to remember when was the last time she and Tommy had sat down and enjoyed a book, but nothing came to mind. No... something did come to mind: time and again her telling Tommy not now as he held up a book, Didi too busy holding Dil. She could see it clearly, the hope in his bright, beautiful eyes dimming as he slowly lowered his favorite Reptar book, his shoulders slumping as he toddled away, Didi not even bothering to watch where he went as she cooed about Dil making a spit bubble.

"Or the last time you played with him?" Betty asked. More memories of Tommy trying to get her attention but her focus solely at her newborn son. Of him being casually pushed away, placed out of sight, promises of 'in a few moments, sweetie' that never came to pass. "Or bathed him or fed him?" Didi felt herself rocking back and forth as memories, horrible, vivid memories of her time and time again putting Dil before Tommy burned through her gray matter, his wonderful smile gradually wasting away much as his form did. She could see the last time she'd truly noticed him, looking so thin and fragile, whimpering for comfort only for her to focus on Dil when he spit up on himself. "You've been so focused on Dil that we all assumed you were done with Tommy. Not like it's a big loss... I mean, he's no Dil! I'd say you traded up!"

The baby in question seemed to gurgle in agreement.

"Tell ya what," Stu said, patting her on the shoulder, "why don't you sit down and feed Dil while we get rid of this stuff. This corner would make a great spot for a playhouse for Dil. No reason to let it go to waste holding all this clutter. Get rid of all this and then we don't ever have to think about it again. Just focus on Dil… like you want." Her friends and husband moved to begin dismantling the broken play pen, Chaz accidently hitting Tommy's skeleton and sending it flopping to the ground. None of them even paid any heed when Stu's foot came down with a crutch, shattering Tommy's arm bone, grinding it to dust.

That was it. That was enough to snap Didi out of her trance. She was moving forward, trying to get to Tommy, to save him, to at least give him the dignity in death that had been stolen from him in life, but it felt like she wasn't moving at all. In fact it became clear that he was moving farther and farther away from her. The cold little corner where his lifeless form lay became shrouded in darkness, his bones crumbling as Stu and their friends carelessly knocked and batted the tiny frame about. Didi fell to her hands and knees, trying to claw her way towards Tommy, only to feel something tug at her dress. Looking back she realized that Dil had grabbed hold of her hem and was pulling her towards him, the baby screeching "MINE! MINE!" over and over, enraged that she dared show Tommy any attention or love. Behind him she saw all of Tommy's clothing and toys, things she had spent hours picking out knowing they would make him smile... now piled up behind the infant that always demanded more.

All sound fell away as Didi felt a soft wind tickle her check. A voice she'd never heard but knew in an instant spoke. It was a voice that would now never be.

 _"It's okay,"_ the little voice said sadly, wavering on the wind. _"I know you weren't really my mommy. I was just a placeholder until you got your real baby. I'll go now, so you can be happy. You don't have to keep pretending you love me any more."_

"No..." Didi sobbed, reaching out as the last little bits of Tommy faded away, wiping away all traces of his existence. She dimly realized that all signs of him, from the pictures on the mantle to the marks he'd made on the wall were disappearing as well. The world was robbing her of her son, leaving her not even evidence that he'd ever existed. She heard the little voice echoing in her ears even as she screamed, "I do love you... Tommy please... Tommy please don't go! I'm sorry, baby! I'm sorry! Don't leave! Don't leave! Please baby! Please! Please-"

 _"Didi!"_

 _"Waa! Waa! Waa!"_

"Don't leave mommy... please don't... please Tommy!"

 _ **"DIDI!"**_

Didi was suddenly aware that she wasn't in the living room, reaching out for the last remains of her son. She was in bed, Stu shaking her almost violently, the baby monitor squawking as Dil sobbed.

"Didi, wake up! You're having a nightmare!" Stu said, trying to rouse her. "Didi-"

"TOMMY!" Didi screamed, struggling to sit up. She looked around wildly, the world blurry without her glasses. "Tommy...Tommy!"

"No, Didi, its Dil. He's hungry... or his diaper needs to be changed... or he just doesn't want us to sleep again," Stu sighed at his bad joke. "You were having a nightmare, Deeds, but you need to-"

Didi grabbed Stu's arm so hard her knuckles went white. "Where's Tommy?! Where's Tommy!?"

"Tommy?" Stu said, confused. He scratched his head. "I don't know-"

While he was going to say "I don't know... his crib where we left him?" Didi never gave him a chance to finish. It had been the wrong thing to say to the panicking mother and Stu found himself hitting the floor with a thud as his wife raced out of the room. Didi barely remembered to grab her glasses as she darted out and down the hall, her bare feet pounding the floor as she raced into the nursery. She saw Dil screaming and kicking but for the first time in months he wasn't her first focus. No, her eyes instead swept the nursery until they came to rest on Tommy's crib.

For a moment she feared the nightmare had been true. The crib was completely empty save for Tommy; no stuffed animals or toys or even a blanket where anywhere near her son to offer comfort. The mattress was at least there and the crib looked to be in the same condition it had been hours before, so that was a relief. Yet there was Tommy, wearing his shirt and diaper…lying there... utterly still.

For one heartbreaking moment she was for sure he was dead.

Then his head moved slightly and the breath she hadn't realized she was holding came out in a powerful blast.

Didi slowly made her way to the crib, her entire body trembling as she looked down at Tommy. The baby stared at her and though she felt such relief at knowing he was alive she also felt her heart shatter at the sight of him. He looked so worn and tired, his own sleep cycle destroyed by Dil's screaming. Tommy had clearly not been getting enough rest, not that she'd noticed herself. He wasn't making any noises either... in fact Didi had never seen Tommy so quiet. He had always been a noisy, happy baby, gurgling and cooing at the sight of her. But now he looked at her and if he had been older Didi would have said it was confusion that crossed his features. It was as if he didn't understand why she was there... why she would be looking at him when Dil yet again demanded her attention. She reached down to touch him and let out a whimper when he didn't move towards her embrace; Tommy always tried to meet her halfway. Always. Yet now he seemed cautious, timid...

...like he was afraid the comfort she was going to offer would be yanked away at a moment's instant. Like he'd been disappointed too many times and his heart couldn't risk yet more disappointment. Like he expected her to turn towards Dil and once more ignore his needs.

" _It's okay… I know you weren't really my mommy"_

A knife went right through her heart.

"Didi, come on," Stu said somewhere behind her. She heard Dil's cries change slightly as he lifted the infant up. "Hmmm... not wet and we just fed him... I think he just wants attention. Tommy seems fine enough, thank goodness. Why don't you come over here and-"

She didn't hear him. Instead her eyes swept over the empty crib.

" _You don't have to keep pretending you love me any more."_

When she spoke she was just as startled as Stu by her words. "Where is the bear?"

"The... what?"

"The bear? Tommy's bear?" She turned away, looking at Dil's crib, and forced herself to believe that she didn't really hear Tommy sigh in disappointment and it was only her imagination. She looked at Dil's crib, her brow furrowing as she looked at all the toys and plushies and other odds and ends that were littered around and in it. While Tommy's side of the room was practically empty Dil's seemed to be bursting at the seams. Gifts that her parents had given her, little toys that were his favorite, items their friends had purchased just for him... they'd all ended up with Dil.

"Oh yeah," Stu said with a yawn, juggling the still fussing Dil. The cries had stopped but the baby was still sniffing, ready to begin sobbing again at any moment. "About a week ago Dil got a hold of it and him and Tommy were fighting over it and I convinced Tommy to let him have it." Seeing her just stare at him Stu swallowed but pushed on. "Tommy got upset but Dil's too little to understand. I sat Tommy down though and explained that as a big brother he has to let Dil have-"

"Give me the bear," Didi said firmly.

"Uh..." Stu looked down at the still whimpering baby. "I don't think-"

"The... bear."

Stu gulped and did as he was told. Dil let out a screech of protest and tried to grab the bear but Didi merely held onto the stuff animal, squeezing it hard against her chest as she panted, holding it like a drowning woman would a preserver. After a few moments her youngest calmed a bit, sniffing and staring at her in surprise.

"Okay," Stu said uneasily. "Well, why don't you-"

"No," Didi said, turning her back to him. "Tommy needs me."

Her husband frowned. "I really think he is fine. But Dil-"

"Put him in the car and drive around for a while! Chaz said that helped Chuckie calm down! Or take him down to the basement. Just... I need to be with Tommy, okay?" Stu opened his mouth but when he saw the way Didi was squeezing the bear, running her fingers along its seams and little eyes he wisely grew silent and backed out of the room, taking Dil with him.

Didi pulled the rocking chair from the corner and dragged it over to Tommy's crib, cringing a little at how he just laid there, staring at her. How many times had he stood up when she came near, excited to see her and ready for a hug and kiss and a cuddle? Now he just looked at her, listless and quiet... so utterly quiet. He had always been the most wonderful of conflicting emotions and actions, her special little guy. Adventurous and daring, exploring the world and curious. Yet when she was near he would seek her out and cling to her for comfort. While Dil was clingy to the point that you couldn't be in the same room with him without him demanding your attention and Angelica had been stubborn, refusing hugs and cuddles and always wanting down, Tommy was a perfect mix of both. He could handle being on his own but when someone he loved was near he opened his little heart to them and would seek joy from them as much as he gave joy to them. Now though? Now he lay there, confused and quiet, the only movements he made being the soft rise and fall of his chest and the blinking of his eyes. He hadn't even been that quiet in the hospital...

Didi shuddered at that thought and leaned over the crib, moving to pick him up only to stop. Maybe it was because he made no move towards her arms like he usually did. Maybe it was because he looked so peaceful that she didn't want to disturb him.

Maybe it was because to hold him was a right she felt she'd lost.

Whatever the case she instead sat down in the rocking chair and gently reached through the slates of the crib, her fingers delicately ghosting along the back of his hand. He didn't flinch away... yet he also didn't move closer, breaking her heart yet again. He just lay there, not even moving to look at her. She placed his bear on her lap, her finger stroking his tiny hand as she thought back to the last time she'd been in this position.

"Your daddy and I tried a long time to have you," she said softly, her voice a soothing murmur. Tommy slowly rolled his head towards her and she got the impression he was thinking 'why are you talking about this?'. "We tried for two years, sweetheart... there were days I cried myself to sleep, wondering why we couldn't have you. I think maybe you weren't ready yet... or maybe you weren't up there and God knew we deserved someone special like you so he made us wait. Maybe he just wanted to hold onto you himself just a bit more." Didi sniffed even as she smiled. "When we found out we were having you we were so happy. We couldn't wait to meet you. I... guess you couldn't wait to meet us either... maybe that's why you came so early."

Didi reached down with her free hand, touching her stomach. "You were suppose to come a month later but you were so energetic then that you just had to get out. But it was too soon... you were so tiny... the doctors-" Didi hiccupped before continuing, her voice wavering with her tears, both for the now and the past, "the doctors wouldn't even let me hold you. They were afraid I'd hurt you, because you were so small. They put you in an incubator, hooking up all these tubes to help your lungs and your heart... I hated it so much. I told them you were scared, that you didn't know what was going on. You didn't get to go to the nursery with all the other babies… just all alone in a tube. One... one nurse even said we shouldn't go see you, so we didn't get attached in case... in case you..."

She couldn't finished. The nightmare was still too fresh.

"All I could do was let you hold my finger. That was it. I couldn't kiss you or cuddle you or even feed you. It was all done by machines and nurses in strange masks. I had dreamed of you for so long and then there you were but I wasn't for sure you'd live long enough for me to ever get to even hold you. I stayed so long there and when I couldn't your daddy did. We were afraid if we left you... we'd just gotten you, sweetheart, and we didn't want you to leave us so soon." She looked down, running the fingers of her free hand along Tommy's bear. "One nurse, a much nicer nurse, gave me this. She said that whenever I wanted to hold you I should hug this bear... store all my love for you in it. That way, when you got better, I could give it to you so you'd have more love than any other baby in the world. So I'd sit with you and hug this bear and I swore that you were the light of my life and I'd never forget that." A tear rolled down her cheek. "I broke that promise in less than two years."

Tommy shifted slightly, kicking his leg but otherwise made no other moments. He just stared at her with quiet eyes as Didi cried.

"Your brother was the first newborn I got to hold and... and I guess that is why I got so wrapped up with him. That and he is so needy. You've always been so strong, even when you were in the hospital... it is easy to forget that you are so young and need mommy as much as Dil does." Didi swallowed hard, slowing the stroking motion she had been making with her fingers. "I know things have changed, sweetheart, and I won't promise that things can go back to the way they were before Dil. Because I love your little brother. I love him so much. But that doesn't mean I love you any less. And mommy is going to work so hard to show you that. I don't know how, Tommy, but I promise that I will find ways to show you I love you... and make up for letting you down."

"Mmmmupf."

Didi blinked, slowly looking down at the crib... and watched as Tommy's hand closed around her finger, giving it a small squeeze. He didn't give her a brilliant smile, he didn't giggle and laugh... no, that would come later. When she earned it.

Didi wiped away her tears. For now though... that was enough.

~MC~MC~MC~

Author's Notes: So… this needs some explaining. Don't ask me why but the other day I got the urge to rewatch some scenes from the Rugrats Movie. And I came away with two thoughts: Dil is a brat and Tommy's parents are horrible.

When my mother got pregnant with my brother she and my dad spent the next few months taking me on fun trips, explaining that when the baby was born we'd have to focus on him a bit but they still loved me. THe thing is... I never remember them focusing on him more than me. I never felt abandoned. My parents did it right and I loved my brother.

But this movie? Dil is a brat that not only steals Tommy's toys he physically hits him. And does his parents do anything? Nope... Stu even encourages it, giving Dil the toys over Tommy being upset, trying to wrap it up in "Well, little brothers are a pain". Now, we come to the big emotional climax. What is it? Is it Dil realizing the error of his ways? Didi and Stu realizing they've neglected their son? Nope! It is Tommy apologizing for getting upset. The big moment is the character that suffered APOLOGIZES TO THE BRAT. And yes, Dil suddnely 'learns to share' but come on, that isn't earned. Not after all the crap he did.

I had several different ways of doing this. At one point the idea was to have Tommy decide to give him mom and dad the 'old shoulder' (cold shoulder) as well as Dil, not realizing they were trying to be nice to him and things only getting worse the harder they tried. Another idea was to redo the movie to make the climax be earned. But I was struck by the utter sadness of Didi dreaming of Tommy dead and telling her that he knew she didn't love him and decided to run with this.

This is a type of angst/hurt/comfort story I love. Tears at the beginning, a character realizing they've done wrong, and then working towards the happy. The Castle fic I did, Chasing Him, is like this. If anyone has any good Rugrats fics like this, please let me know.

Final question: is there a demand for more? Because I have at least two more chapters in mind. The first would be focused on Dil, revealing that he too had a nightmare concerning Tommy that makes him see the error of his ways. The other would be pure fluff with Didi having a day with Tommy, showing him she loved him and slowly getting him back to his normal self.


	2. Chapter 2

Dil sighed, trying to keep his eyes closed even as the urge to squirm grew stronger. Daddy had said Mr. Sandyman would sprinkle sandy dust on him when it was time for sleeping and right now he felt like he'd been coated in sleepy-time sand. He remembered mommy showing him something on the telly-vision about a beach covered in sleepy sand and that is what he felt like right now: covered in it and ready to dream. But he couldn't, however, and as much as he tried it didn't work. First his diapie had gotten wet, then he'd felt hungie and needed a bottle, then his jammies had been itchy, then he wet his diapie again…

Dil's face scrunched up. Today had been a bad day and he wanted to get to tomorrow.

When Tommy and him had gotten lost in the forest Dil had come to realize just how important his brother was to him. Tommy had saved him from the scary booming sky and made sure his diapies were changed and he got nummy food and made him feel safe. Mommy hadn't come… daddy hadn't come… only Tommy. And despite what his brother may have thought, Dil had listened to him as he ranted, even if the monkeys had been really funny. The memory of Tommy staring down at him in anger suddenly flashed in his mind and Dil shuddered, nearly letting out a fresh sob but managing to choke it back. He didn't want to cry, not yet… not if he could hold out just a bit more. But Tommy's face had been so scary and when Dil had seen it he'd realized that Tommy wasn't merely playing with him. It wasn't a silly game, like when daddy would say he was doggy and bark at him or mommy would make silly whooshing noises when she turned his bottle into an airpwane. No… Tommy had been MAD and it was SCARY and Dil didn't want Tommy to be scary! He wanted him to be Tommy! And he had! He had become Tommy again and they'd gone to sleep and he'd shared his blankie with Tommy and then found mommy and daddy! 

Dil had meant to be better to Tommy. He really had! When mommy had given him a bottle and Dil had gotten his fill then given Tommy the rest. He could have drank more but he gave the extra to Tommy so he wouldn't be hungie. And he hadn't cried as much for a full day! That took so much work! It was enough to make him cranky, not crying the moment something bothered him… was it his fault that when he got cranky he cried?

Today though things had been… different. It had started out the same, with mommy cuddles and daddy playing silly games with him and nummy yum yums and diapie changes and a nice nap! It had been so great! But then, after his afternoon bottle, mommy left him and Tommy in the playpen and Tommy had tried to take one of Dil's toys! They were his toys! Didn't Tommy see him gum them and mark them as his? Dil didn't take the toys Tommy marked! Okay, so Tommy didn't mark any of his toys but it wasn't Dil's fault that Tommy was silly and didn't mark his toys. Or maybe Tommy wanted him to have all his toys! Yeah, that was it! Tommy loved him and wanted him to have all the toys because they made him happy! Yup, that was it. Except Tommy had tried to take one of his toys and gotten upset and that made Dil upset and daddy had come over and agreed with Dil that Tommy should let him have the toys. He'd then found a bally that Dil didn't want anymore and given it to Tommy and told him he could play with that. And Tommy had been happy enough with that.

…except when Dil looked at the bally he'd begun to think about everything HE could do with the bally! He could hold it and gum it and squeeze it and lick it and hold it and look at it… it was such a fun looking bally and Dil had to have it! He could do so many fun things with it, things Tommy would never do! Tommy didn't know how to play with the bally right… so Dil had figured that he could play with it and if Tommy watched him he could learn how to play with a bally right and then if he got a new one that wasn't as nice as the pretty bally then he could play right!

At least until Dil got bored and wanted to play with that bally. Because he was the little baby and the littliest of babies always got what they wanted.

But there hadn't been a new bally. Just the one daddy had given Tommy, the bally that Dil had suddenly wanted more than he had ever wanted before. He threw aside the Reptar toy he'd been shaking, making sure that it tumbled just to his side so Tommy knew he was merely setting it aside and not offering it to him, and grabbed the bally the moment Tommy rolled it close enough to him. Tommy had toddled over…

" _No, Dil," Tommy said firmly. "Daddy said I could play with that ball. Yous got all the other toys-"_

" _MINE!" Dil screeched, hugging the ball to his chest._

" _Dil, you hafta share!" Tommy complained._

" _NO SHARE!" Dil shouted. "MY BALL!"_

" _You weren't even playing with it! You have plenty of toys… let me just-"  
_

" _MINE!" Dil screamed, reaching down and grabbing his rattle. When Tommy didn't listen to him in the past Dil had learned that a bop with the rattle would get him to stop and do what he wanted. Dil waved his arm and swung away, feeling the rattle wobble in his hand when it connected firmly with Tommy's head. His big brother instantly tumbled away and Dil giggled at the way he fell. Tommy was so silly! Dil wanted to hit him again, cause it was so fun! But when Tommy sat up he didn't come near Dil or his rattle. He just… looked at him, sniffing back tears. Dil grunted… Tommy wasn't playing right! He was supposed to come back! Not just sit there! Dil sniffed in frustration… why was Tommy so mean? Why wasn't he playing right?_

 _Dil reared back and let out a scream that rattled the house._

" _Oh Dilly-willy, what's wrong?" Didi said, hurrying over and picking him up. She didn't notice the way Tommy was rubbing his head as all her focus was rightly on Dil. The little Pickle sniffed as his mommy rocked him back and forth… but when he looked down at Tommy his cries turned to hiccups when he saw the stare his brother was giving him. It wasn't angry or upset or mad… Dil didn't know what it was but he didn't like it. It was almost like he'd just lost something important…_

After that Tommy had stayed away from him, not coming anywhere near him or his toys. At supper Tommy had been quiet and when mommy had gone to give him his bath he hadn't even giggled and splashed. That made a bit of sense, as Dil honestly didn't get what was fun about scary baths… but still, something wasn't right with Tommy. Dil figured he must just be sleepy and if he could just get some rest he'd be back to normal and play with Dil and pay attention to him and stop trying to steal his toys…

Dil's nose scrunched. It itched. It was so itchy! He tried not to cry… he really tried… but Tommy wouldn't want him to have an itchy nose, would he? Tommy would understand, right? Of course… he was Dil and Tommy wouldn't want him to have an itchy nose.

His mind settled, Dil took a deep breath and opened his eyes, preparing to cry so he could get mommy and daddy to come and itch his nose and maybe cuddle with him and maybe give him a bottle if he was hungie and-

Dil froze, tilting his head in confusion. "Moby?" He reached up, but didn't find him mobile, or moby as he called it, hanging above him. Neither was the ceiling that he liked to look at while waiting for mommy and daddy to come. Instead he saw clouds… not happy, fluffy clouds like in the picture books he liked to try and eat, but scary dark clouds that flashed every once and a while, hiding the dark night sky. His head rolled to the right and rather than see the slates of his crib he saw trees and grass and a muddy puddle. He shifted, finding himself no longer laying on his comfy matt-ess but instead the hard ground. Cold wawa was falling on him, soaking his jammies and making him shiver.

Then he heard the chittery calls.

The monkeys.

He was back in the forest.

"Dil wants monkeys!" Tommy called out, Dil turning and watching as his brother toddled over to him, holding a jar of nanas. "Monkeys want bananas… everybody gets what theys want!"

Dil felt tears gather in his eyes even as he stared at Tommy in confusion. How did they get out of the nursery? Why were they back in the forest? What was going on? Tommy was coming closer, pulling the nana jar's lid off and Dil shuddered as the sky went boomboom. He reached up, clinging to Tommy, whimpering in fright. He didn't want monkeys! He didn't want nananas! He wanted Tommy to keep him safe-

-Tommy shoved him away.

Dil didn't even cry as he rolled away from his brother, falling into the muddy puddle with a splash. He struggled to lift his head and stared up at Tommy his shock, feeling the dirt and mud soaking into his jammies and nappie, the wawa making his skin cold. The monkeys were calling and the sky was going boomboom and Dil didn't understand anything. He looked up and saw that Tommy was suddenly bigger, almost as big as mommy and daddy, and he was glaring at him and was so… so MAD! Dil had never seen him so mad and he didn't like it! It was the scariest of scary things ever!

"You think I'd just forgive you because your scawied?" Tommy shouted down at Dil, startling him. "You are a bad baby! You take everything and don't care who you huwt! You hit me and you're mean to me! You don't care though… you just want me to make you feels better when the thunder goes boom! You're selfish and horrible and I wish mommy and daddy had never brought you home! You aren't just a bad baby, you're a bad bwother!"

Dil shook his head. No… no, he wasn't a bad baby! He was a good baby! Everyone said so! And he wasn't a bad bwother… was he?

Tommy dragged over the diapie bag and pushed it over into the muddle puddle, dumping everything on and around Dil. "You don'ts care 'bout anybody but yourself! You only love t'ings! Well, you can have everyt'ing because I am done being your bwother! And when mommy and daddy wealize how bad you are they will be done with you too! Then no one will be 'round you 'cept t'ings!"

Dil panted, tears streaking down his face as he reached up. "Bu…bu… my Tommy."

"I'M NOT YOUR TOMMY!" Tommy roared. "I don't bewong to you and I never want to see again! I HATE YOU!" With that Tommy turned and left, ignoring Dil as he cried out.

"Tommy! Tommy!" Dil cried. But his brother didn't come back… his cries only attracted the monkeys who climbed down and began to circle him. Dil cringed; up close they weren't silly at all. They were scary and he didn't like them one bit. One of them leaned down to sniff him and Dil tried to wiggle away but all that did is get more mud in his diapie.

"Mine!"

Dil blinked. The boombooms grew quiet and the monkeys stopped making their 'cheechee' noises. Raising his head up Dil was shocked to see a little monkey that looked just like him sitting where he'd been lying before Tommy had shoved him into the puddle. The baby monkey pointed at Dil and cried out "MINE! MINE!" and suddenly the big monkeys began to tug at his jammies!

"No! No!" Dil screamed. "Tommy!" But Tommy didn't come and the monkeys removed his jammies and diapie and gave them to the baby Dil-monkey who crawled over. When Dil tried to grab them back the monkey grabbed a rattle and smacked him. Dil screamed in pain… that had hurt! That wasn't fun at all!

Was… was that what it felt like when he hit Tommy?

Dil shut his eyes, shivering as the mud coated his naked little body, the wawa that fell from the sky only making it worse. He tried to cover his head but the Dil-Monkey kept hitting him and it hurt and why did it hurt this wasn't fun! Dil hiccupped and sobbed… he didn't like the forest or the monkeys or the nananas… he didn't want to be here anymore!

"It's okay Dil."

The baby's sobs began to subside as he felt someone lift him up. It was mommy! She'd found him! Dil gurgled in relief. She'd make things better! She'd get him clothes and a bottle and she'd find Tommy and-

Dil opened his eyes and screamed.

The figure sounded like mommy and was shaped like mommy but she wasn't mommy! No, it was all the toys he'd taken from Tommy glued together to form something that resembled mommy but wasn't! Not-mommy had wooden blocks for arms and a stuffed snakey for a leg and her head was the ball he'd fought Tommy for earlier that day. Dil cringed and tried to wiggle free but Not-mommy just held him… and it wasn't a good holding either! She wasn't cuddling him or rocking him… he could feel the edges of the blocks pressing against his back and when she walked she stepped too hard and jerked him too much, making his body ache. As they entered the living room she even smacked his head against the door frame and Dil screamed but she didn't care! She didn't care because she was just dumb toys!

"It's okay, Dil," Not-mommy said, her voice monotone and bland, with none of the love and affection he was used to. "We'll get you in a diapie and get food and it will be all better." She practically dropped him onto the changing table and roughly lifted up his legs, causing him to howl. She didn't sing the little song she always did when changing him or use the cool wet nappies to clean his bottom… it felt like she was using rough wood to scrape his behind! It hurt and Dil tried to get free but Not-mommy didn't care one bit! She grabbed a diapie and put it on but it was too tight and Dil felt tears rolling down his cheeks as she roughly tugged new scratchie jammies onto him.

"Ma-mommy," Dil whimpered. "Huwt"

"What is 'huwt'?" Not-mommy asked, because toys didn't know what huwt was, before shrugging and grabbing a bottle. It took her several times to get it into his mouth and one time it even poked him in the eye but when she did Dil found the milk was cold and tasted funny but she wouldn't let him stop drinking. And then she made him drink more and more! She kept grabbing bottles and Dil felt like his stomach would burst. No more bottle! No more bottle!

Finally, after what felt like forever and ever Not-mommy picked him up and moved over to the playpen, holding out her arms before simply dropping him. Dil screamed, flailing as he fell, only to land on a bunch of stuffed amimals. He looked around and realized that everyone in the house was made of toys. There was a Not-daddy and a Not-g'anpa and a Not-doggy and…

"Tommy!" Dil screamed desperately, grabbing for his brother. But when he tugged on his shirt he found that it wasn't Tommy but a Not-Tommy, also made up of toys. He cringed and backed away.

"All you care about is t'ings," Not-Tommy said. "You don'ts care about me or mommy or daddy! So you can spend forevers with t'ings since they make you happy!"

"NO!" Dil screamed as the stuffied amimals began to grab him. A Reptar doll yanked on his leg and Dil cried out when he pulled it right off and replaced it with a toy chocho! Dil waved the new train leg in fear as the other dolls began to replace the rest of him with toys. "NO! TOMMY! TOMMY!" He begged Tommy to come back… he didn't want to be a t'ing! He wanted to be Dil and have mommy and daddy and Tommy and doggy and g'anpa! He reached up with an arm that was now a bottle, trying to grab Not-Tommy as he sank down into the pit of toys with all the other bad babies…

Dil's eyes snapped open and he let out a gasp. He was lying in his crib once more and when he waved his hand in front of his face he saw it was an actual hand and not a bottle. He'd heard daddy talk about nightscares… was that what he'd had? Was it just a nightscare?

He looked to his left and let out a screech when he saw the stuffed bear that he'd fought with Tommy over a week ago. It was lying there, with all the other toys he'd wanted, but now he didn't want the bear or the ball or the blocks… he wanted-

"Tommy!" Dil cried, looking over across the room. He saw his brother lying in his crib and Dil reached out for him but his arms were too short. "Tommy! My Tommy!" But Tommy didn't say a word… he just looked at him before turning away. "No… Tommy no go!" Dil cried. Tommy must still think all he wanted was t'ings! And if he thought that he'd have to go with the toys and bad babies! He looked about, kicking and fussing, trying to think of something… the bear! He could give Tommy the bear! That would show he wasn't a bad baby! He went to grab it only for two big hands to lift him up.

It was daddy! And there was mommy, checking on Tommy! Dil wiggled… daddy could help him get the bear and he could give it to Tommy and Tommy would want to be his bwother again and they'd be happy! But daddy didn't lower him… he checked Dil to see if he were wet and then tried to give him a bottle but Dil forced that away. He didn't want a bottle, especially if it became his arm! He had to get to Tommy! He had to show him-

But then daddy gave mommy the bear. Dil began to fuss. No… no, he was supposed-to give the bear to Tommy! He had to! "Daddy! No, bear to Tommy!" Dil cried but daddy didn't listen and instead was taking him away. Dil continued to cry even as daddy took him towards the car.

"Let's go for a ride, champ, maybe calm you down?"

Dil hiccupped as daddy put him in his special seat. "no… Tommy…" he whimpered as he felt himself grow wearing, his nightscare having sapped his strength. He… he needed to see Tommy…

"Good baby… Dil… good baby," he murmured as daddy turned on the car. "Tommy… Dil… Dil sowwy."

~MC~MC~MC~

Author's Note: And so we get Dil's nightmare. Dear god, do I have a twisted mind?

Anyway, I leave it up to the reviewers: Should we get another nightmare or two, maybe from Stu? Or are you like me and ready for the fluff of Didi, Stu, and Dil working to repair their relationships with Tommy? OR should I just end here?


	3. Chapter 3

Tommy stared up at his mommy, trying to keep his face neutral even as a feeling of utter confusion washed over him. This wasn't normal confusion, like when he tried to figure out why adults did silly things like make him eat yucky vegatibbles instead of yummy candy or why they always hid the interesting looking bottles behind doors with locks that even his screwdriver couldn't get him into. It wasn't a scared confused either, like with the creepy Mr. Friend, or a happy confused like when Phil and Lil's mom once gave them chocolate milk instead of their normal bottles.

No, this was just confused confused. He didn't understand what was going on and why it was happening and he honestly didn't know what he should do.

He had a feeling though that what was happening was somehow connected to what had happened the day before. Things had started out pretty much as they had for the last few months: Tommy attempting to have a normal day only for Dil to routinely ruin it and his mommy and daddy failing to see just how miserable he was. First had been breakfast when Dil had reached over and knocked his bowl of apple sauce on the floor and when daddy had went to get more he'd discovered that they were out so Tommy had to have mushy carrots which tasted horribible. Then he'd wanted to explore the under the couch because he'd spotted something shiny under there but Dil had been mad he couldn't go and begun crying and alterted mommy to what Tommy was doing and she'd put him right back in the playpen! His lunch and nappie had been okay, though Dil needing a diapie change meant that mommy had to stop singing his nappie time song but Tommy was used to that, sadly.

Things though had gone down hill when Dil once again stole Tommy's toys. He'd thought his brother had remembered that they had to share but apparently their time in the scary forest hadn't taught Dil anything and he was back to being a greedy baby who wanted everything! Daddy had finally given him a ball which he didn't really want because what fun was a ball when there was no one else to play with but then Dil decided he wanted that too! They'd fought again and Dil had decided to hit Tommy with his rattle and it really hurt! Not as much though as Dil laughing at him and then mommy not even noticing he had a booboo because all she cared about nowadays was Dil. That reminded him of the forest and when Dil had giggled about him going into the mud. Tommy had wanted to yell at him again but then he had a b'illiant idea! It was so smarts that he hadn't said a word which confused Dil a lot but Tommy didn't care because he'd had a b'lliant idea and he told his friends all about it when they came to visit just before supper.

 _"So Dil totally forgot how to be a good baby?" Lil said. Tommy merely nodded, wincing slightly... his head still hurt a bit and nodding only made it worse. "I thought he'd learned his lesson!"_

 _"He's never gonna learn!" Phil declared. "We should try taking him to the hospicile again."_

 _Tommy shook his head though. "No, that won't work... mommy and daddy love Dil and if we took him back they'd just go get him again. They might even get more than one so they can both hug him at the same time!"_

 _"What are ya gonna do though, Tommy?" Chuckie asked. "Ya can't just keep goin' on like this!"_

 _"Nope, and I have a b'illiant idea, Chuckie!" Tommy gave his friends a determined grin and smacked his little fist into his palm. "I'm tired of Dil hurtin' me and mommy and daddy not noticing me so I'm gonna stop tryin' to gets their attemption! I'm gonna give them the old shoulder!"_

 _"The old shoulder?" Phil asked. "What's that?"_

 _Tommy waved at where his g'anpa was sleeping. "I heard G'andpa talking bout it the other day. He said when g'andma is mad at him she doesn't yell or sc'eam... she just gives him the old shoulder."_

 _"Oh," Lill said. "...so what's the old shoulder?"_

 _"It's when you think what someone's doing has gotten old so yous igsnores'em!"_

 _Chuckie trembled at that. "Your gonna igsnores your mommy and daddy? I don't think that's a good idea., Tommy! What if you need a bottle?"_

 _"Or a new diapie?" Lil asked._

 _"Or a scary lizard man comes in wanting to steal all your cookies?" Phil said with fright._

 _Tommy shrugged. "It's not like mommy and daddy would notice anyway. All they care about anymore is Dil so I'ms not gonna bother with trying to get their attention anymore! The same with Dil... I'm gonna pretend he isn't even here anymore. If he takes my toys or begins trying to suck on my hand I'm just gonna walk away and act like he's imaginary!"_

 _"That sounds really hard, Tommy," Lil said sadly._

 _Tommy took a breath, letting them see he wasn't as sure about this plan as he tried to act like. "Yeah, but I have ta do something. It hurts every time mommy and daddy ignore me..." he rubbed his head and winced, "and it really hurts when Dil doesn't. A baby's gotta do what a baby's gotta do! I might have to sit in stinky diapies or miss a snack but if it shows mommy and daddy I'm not gonna just sit around and wait for them ta notice me than I'll just have to do it!"_

 _"We'll help ya out, Tommy!" Phil declared. "We'll sneak you in snacks! Here!" He reached into his diapie and pulled out a bug he'd been saving for later. "And there's more where that came from!"_

 _"Thanks guys!" Tommy said, the babies moving together for a group hug._

After that Tommy had enacted his plan. When mommy asked him if he were ready for supper he hadn't looked up at her or said anything; he just kept staring at some blocks until she picked him up and took him to the kitchen. And when it was time for bed he hadn't smiled once as she tried to read him a story... not that it mattered when Dil began screaming his little head off. Tommy had just laid there, thinking about other things like all the adventures he wanted to go on with his friends and what Reptar might be doing at that moment. It was nice... peaceful... and he actually found himself falling asleep without any stories or songs.

Then, in the middle of the night, he'd heard Dil trying to get his attention. He'd opened his eyes and seen Dil reaching out of his crib but Tommy just rolled over; Dil probably wanted his jammies now that he had all of the toys and stuffed aminals. Dil hadn't liked that and begun screeching until mommy and daddy came in.

But that's when things got weird. Mommy came in, like she always did, but instead of going over to Dil's crib she ran over to him. Tommy didn't understand; why would she come over to him? He wasn't crying? He wasn't hungry, he wasn't wet, he wasn't frightened by a shadow... so why come to him? Did she think he was Dil? That might be it. He knew sometimes he got so tired that he got confused. When Dil had first came home from the hopsicle Tommy had gotten so little sleep he thought Spike's tail was his bottle! That was it... his mommy thought that he was Dil. And that made Tommy sad... the only time his mommy paid attention to him was when she thought he was his little brother.

Tommy blinked, staring up at his mommy's face. She looked so scared. Scared like Chuckie when they went through the car wash. She reached down towards him only to stop and Tommy felt very sad; she'd figured out that he wasn't Dil. Yet she didn't go away. She kept looking down at him like she was surprised to see him. Had she forgotten so much about him that she didn't know who he was anymore? No, that couldn't be it, because he heard daddy say his name.

"Where's Tommy's bear?"

Tommy pursed his little lips. Where was his bear? With Dil! Daddy had given him the bear before then went into the forest, right before he'd given him his stupid sponsibility. Didn't mommy know that? She must not because she seemed to get mad at that and then looked away from him. Tommy sighed at that but didn't do anything else other than turn and wiggle his right shoulder at her. He vaguely remembered that he liked using his right hand so that must mean his right shoulder was the old one since older things tended to do things better, like how daddy could walk better than him. But mommy didn't notice him giving her the old shoulder and Tommy realized that when you got really old you couldn't do things well, like how g'andpa couldn't run as fast as daddy, so that meant his left shoulder was the old shoulder!

He went to wiggle his left shoulder only for him to see that his mommy had taken the bear from Dil's crib and was now holding it. Great! Now mommy was stealing toys! Was Dil infecting them? Was Bad Baby a diseebs?

Mommy told daddy to take Dil and go for a car ride. Tommy forced himself not to pout at that; he loved car rides! And he never got to ride in one at night! Dil would get to see all sorts of fun things and Tommy was stuck in his crib. That wasn't fair!

Tommy watched as his mommy pulled a rocking chair up to his crib, sitting down and setting the bear in her lap. She looked so sad now and Tommy didn't understand. She looked like she was crying but mommys and daddies didn't cry... they took care of babies when they cried! What was a baby supposed to do when mommy cried? Tommy decided not to think about that, remembering he was giving his mommy the old shoulder, and instead looked up and began to think about how cool it would be for Reptar to battle a Robo Reptar. But when got to the good part his mommy began to talk about strange things. She said they'd wanted him for a long time... was she explaining why she didn't notice him anymore? Cuss he wasn't new like Dil? If so Tommy didn't want to hear about that and he began to hum to himself. But then mommy was talking about how he had arrived too soon and he realized she was talking about when he had to live in the fish tank. Only she called it an incubaby, which he guessed was the name for fish tanks where babies lived. Tommy didn't like thinking about the incubaby... when he'd talked about it with Phil and Lil and Chuckie he hadn't minded because he was thinking about the good part, about how he'd gotten to meet his mommy. But now it just reminder him of how she used to care for him and now it was all about Dil and he suddenly feared that she was going to put him back in the fish tank and leave him all alone!

He wanted to cry at that but he sucked up his tears. He was a big baby and would not cry... he'd committed to giving them the old shoulder and wouldn't give up. They could put him in the incubaby and he'd find a way out !

Just as he got done thinking this Tommy realized that his mommy had taken hold of his hand and was stroking it. It was just like when he'd been in the incubaby and she'd sat beside him and held his hand. It made him feel a little better but he still couldn't help but worry that this wouldn't last.

She mentioned something about a nurse worried that he 'wouldn't make it' and Tommy got confused again. Make what? A drawing? Something with clay? He remembered what it had been like in the fish tank... back then he couldn't sit up, let alone make something out of clay! And even if he could there would have been no room! She should have never listened to that nurse because she was silly. He was glad though to hear that another nurse was smart and gave her the bear and hearing that she put her love into it made him feel warm in his tummy; he'd always known his bear was special and that is why he'd fought to get it back from Dil. He wished he had the bear now though, as he could use some extra love.

As his mommy finished talking Tommy felt sad for her. He knew she was upset and wanted him to make her feel better. And he did want to... she was his mommy and he didn't want her upset. But he remembered what had happened with Dil and how quickly he'd gone back to his old ways and Tommy didn't want that to happen with mommy. He didn't want to say it was okay and then she forgot about him all over again. He also remembered how he used to trust Angelica all the time, how she'd pretend to be nice and he'd believe maybe she had changed, only for her to be the same old Angelica again. It felt like that was something big people did, pretending to be nice until they didn't want to be, and he was worried his mommy was doing the same thing. But he didn't want to be mean to her because then she might not even try. So instead he just squeezed her finger and said, "I know you are apologying mommy but I can't say its okay because it still huwts. But if you prove that you won't forget me no more than... maybe we can be mommy and Tommy again."

Unfortunately mommy couldn't understand him and just heard him babble like always but that was okay because she seemed to get happier at that. Tommy closed his eyes as she began to hum, deciding that he would get some sleep and think more about things in the morning.

The next thing he knew he was in a fish tank. But it wasn't the scary incubaby one he'd been in but a real fish tank with fishies and a castle and tall planties. And he was small enough to swim around and do turns and spins just like he was a fishie too! He couldn't even do that in the bath! And mommy was there too and she held his hand and they swam together and Tommy discovered that when mommies were in fish tanks they could understand babies so he talked with her and told her all about the fishies. He thought about telling her about Dil but he didn't want to be sad or make her sad so he just focused on the fishies and having fun!

 _"What is that one called, Tommy?" his mommy asked._

 _"That's a blue fish," Tommy said seriously._

 _"But its yellow," mommy said. Tommy laughed because he'd tricked her and she laughed too because she thought it was funny. She didn't mind that she'd tricked him because it was just a silly trick, not like when Angelica tricked him and his friends, but a silly trick that they could both laugh at. Tommy's laughter slowly faded though and his mommy looked at him, concerned. "What's wrong?"_

 _"This is just a dream," Tommy said softly as they passed by a friendly turtle. "You aren't really my mommy and I'm gonna wake up and she'll be back to forgetting me."_

 _"Maybe she won't," dream-mommy reasoned._

 _Tommy just sighed. "No… she don't need me anymore. She has Dil." He shut his eyes and let go of his mommy's hand, kicking towards the surface. "I wish I could stay here though…"_

But then he felt his mommy still holding his hand and when he opened his eyes he realized he was lying in his crib and mommy was still holding his hand, just like she did when he was in the incubaby. She was looking down at him and smiling and when she saw he was awake she reached down and stroked his cheek. It felt nice and he leaned into her touch for a moment but then he remembered that he was giving her the old shoulder and he stopped and just looked up at her, wiggling his left shoulder.

"Ready to get up, Tommy?" his mommy asked. Tommy didn't say a word, since he wasn't answering her, but his mommy had decided that it was time to get up and she lifted him out of his crib. She checked his diapie and sang to him as she did so and then took him down to the kitchen, starting work on his bottle and his breakfast. Tommy was really confused; this was the first time in ages that he was going to get to eat first! Normally Dil got fed first because he got fussy and that meant at times Tommy's bottle was too warm or too cold but this time it was just right. His mommy grabbed him some banana sauce and Tommy was even more shocked; Dil was scared of bananas ever since the monkeys and the last few times his mommy had tried to feed him it Dil had thrown such a fit that she'd been forced to just throw it away. Tommy had missed bananas and savored several bites. For a moment he wondered if maybe he'd dreamed Dil and things were back to normal.

"Didi, we're back!" Tommy turned, surprised to see his daddy walk in wearing his jammies. However, he remembered he was giving daddy the old shoulder too and promptly looked away when his daddy tried to wave at him, Dil in his arms.

"Stu, where have you been? Don't tell me you drove around with Dil the entire time!"

"No, we pulled off the side of the road and I must have fallen asleep but that doesn't matter because I have a brilliant idea!" Tommy blinked when his daddy kissed his head before setting Dil down in his feeding chair. Daddy hadn't done that in a long time either! What was going on?

"Tommy!" Dil squealed, reaching for him. "Tommy! Tommy! Sowwy!"

"Sorry?" Tommy said, confused. He didn't get what Dil was saying and sometimes wished he was a big baby so he could understand him like he understood his friends.

Dil nodded his head, tears in his eyes. "Sowwy Tommy! No huwt! Dil no toy! Dil no toy!"

"No toy? What-" Tommy paused, suddenly remembering what he'd promised to do. "No Dil, I'm not gonna talk or play with you anymore till you are a good baby! I'm giving you the old shoulder!"

"GOOD BABY!" Dil screamed in fright, looking about with wild eyes. "No make Dil toy! Tommy! Tommy!"

"Looks like Dil missed Tommy," his mommy said, lifting Dil up and bringing him over to Tommy. His little brother hugged him as he whimpered but Tommy refused to back down, still remembering how much his head had hurt when Dil hit him. After a few moments his mommy realized Tommy wasn't in the mood for hugs and reluctantly pulled a whimpering Dil away. Tommy didn't like that he'd made his brother upset but if that was the only way he learned then he'd have to stomach it. "Sorry, Dilly-willy, but I think Tommy is hungry right now. You can play with him and your toys later, okay?"

"NO!" Dill screeched in horror. "No make Dil toy! Tommy! Help!" Tommy wondered what Dil was upset about… but whatever it was he could save himself from it. Tommy was done saving bad babies.

"Someone is cranky today," Tommy's mommy said, before turning to his daddy. "Did he ever fall asleep?"

Tommy glanced out of the corner of his eyes, trying hard not to let his parents see him watching them, and was surprised at how excited his daddy looked. "Yeah, and so did I… Deeds… let me tell about the dream I had!"


	4. Chapter 4

Stu sighed as he pulled into parking lot next to the kids' favorite park, the engine of the car growing quiet with a simple turn of a key. He wished a turning key could quiet his screeching son. Dil had been fussing the entire time; when it appeared that he was finally growing quiet, his cries trailing off into whimpers, the baby would suddenly begin sobbing again. It wasn't a frustrated cry or a needy cry... if Stu had to put a term to it, he would say it was a desperate cry. It was the crying of a baby who wanted something badly... but Stu honestly didn't know what.

Rubbing his eyes, Stu got out of the car, making sure to pocket his keys as the last thing he needed was to look Dil in the car while he was in his pajamas, and moved to slide in next to the whimpering tot in the back seat. The moon was nice and bright out so he was able to move about the back seat without needing to flick on the dome light… a good thing as he feared turning it on would cause the baby to freak out even more; it seemed like anything and everything was setting the newest little Pickle off. Dil looked at him, eyes shimmering with tears, his little lips quivering as he murmured baby talk. Dil needed something and Stu cursed the fact that he didn't speak baby. Perhaps he should invent something... something that would translate baby… maybe make him understand why he didn't want to sleep… which was so nice… nice and peace… and quiet… and comfy…

Dil reached up and tugged on his pajama top, snapping Stu out of his sleepy thoughts. "Alright buddy, what is it? Are you hungry? Wet?" Dil just kept looking at him, blinking owlishly at him. "Come on, buddy, daddy needs some sleep. You want daddy to sleep, right?" Dil blew a snot bubble in response and Stu wished he knew if that meant yes or no. "Well, if you won't do it for me..." he reached down and grabbed a sock puppet that Tommy sometimes liked to suck on, slipping it onto his hand, "...will you do it for Mr. Socky the-"

Dil's eyes went wide and he let out a terrified shriek, going white as a sheet as he tried to wiggle away from Stu's puppet hand. The tired inventor decided he didn't want to pull at that thread and figure out why Dil was now scared of sockpuppets and instead just shut his eyes, yanking the puppet out. He reached out and rubbed Dil's tummy, the baby quieting as he began to tug and squeeze Stu's fingers, as if trying to reassure himself that Stu had a hand and not a puppet for a hand… which was just silly. Why would Dil worry about that?

"Buddy..." Stu said with a yawn, "please... daddy needs sleep. Mommy needs sleep. Tommy needs sleep-"

"It's Tommy that's the problem."

Stu blinked in confusion. "Dil? Are you talking? And with a woman's voice?" he looked down at the baby but Dil looked just as confused as him. Stu started when a delicate hand reached out and gently wiped Dil's face with a Kleenex. The little tot's brow furrowed before he began to giggle and reach out to the new arrival.

"You remember me from up there, don't you?" the new arrival said gently, still cleaning Dil's face. Dil gurgled and after a moment she said, "Yes, but I didn't mean that you should take everything. I meant you should take every EXPERIENCE... not all of Tommy's toys." Dil let out a coo that oddly, to Stu's ears, sounded like a, "oh, sorry." The newcomer clicked her tongue, her tone managing to be light and loving while also holding a touch of disappointment. "And I certainly didn't want you to hit him. It is okay to be frustrated by we do NOT hit." Dil shifted at that, not liking he was being scolded but, to Stu's tired eyes, looking rather bashful at that statement. "Don't worry... I don't think it will be too late for you and Tommy... but it's not going to be easy. You hurt his feelings real bad." The newcomer looked up at Stu, holding his gaze. "You and Didi did as well."

"...mom," Stu said as softly as he could, almost frightened the figure before him would disappear if he spoke any louder. Trixie Pickles didn't look like Stu had seen her last, sickly and frail in a hospital bed, tubes running all about her and machines quietly beeping. That memory haunted him even now, made even worse by the fact that only a few months later it had been Tommy in the hospital, fighting for his life while hooked up to machines and tubes. When he'd seen his tiny son lying in the incubator, struggling to breathe, Stu had fallen to his knees and begun sobbing, his brother and Charlotte helping him up and out of the room until he could continue. Drew had realized what was wrong instantly and said through his tears, "He isn't mom... he isn't mom."

Trixie didn't look like the last time he'd seen her. She was as she looked in his dreams, young again and vital, smiling down at him with love shining in her eyes. Her face free of the ravages of old age, her hair dark once more, her arms strong enough to lift him up and chase the nightmares away. He reached out, wanting to graze her cheek or hold her hand but frightened that she'd dissipate if he tried.

His mother reached out and took his hand, removing the choice from him. "Hello Stuie."

"How... how is this...?" Stu whispered.

Trixie looked down at Dil, using her free hand to tickle his feet. "Your silly daddy... he doesn't realize that I'm always here." Dil, for the first time in what felt like ages, giggled in delight as Trixie playfully wiggled his toes through the fabric of his jumper. "Who do you think sat with Tommy and wiped his tears away when he was in the incubator, confused and scared? Who steered him away from sharp edges and tricky falls when he managed to escape his play pen? Who was with them in the forest, shielding them from that horrid wolf that wanted to eat them up?" Dil murmured, remembering the scary doggy but Trixie tickled him again and chased the nightmare away. "If you knew half the things Tommy and his little friends get up to when you aren't looking you'd be white as a sheet. Thankfully I'm around to gently steer him away." 

"So… you're a ghost?" Stu asked.

Dil let out a gasp of fright and tried to cover his face with a blankie. Trixie merely reached over and tugged it away, smiling. "See, daddy is so silly Dylan. Do I look like I am rattling spooky chains?" Dil let out a gurgle-like burp. "Well, I suppose they could be invisible but you'll have to take my word for it. Daddy thinks that we are merely these fleshy shells but you remember, Dilly-willy, that we are luminous beings, far more than what we are during our short lives. Death isn't the end as it is a return to above." Dil nodded firmly and Trixie turned to Stu. "I prefer 'guardian angel' myself, to answer your question." Trixie smiled sadly. "Normally I am just the little voice that whispers in your ear or the lucky turn that turns disaster into a close shave… but there are times when one is at a crossroads and their decisions in that moment will determine not only their fate but the fate of many around them. And when that happens… well, here we are." 

Stu frowned. "I… I don't understand. What do you? What are you-"

Trixie leaned over. "Stu… I do this twice… once for you and once for Dil." And with that she bopped him across the back of the head, Dil let out a whimper of sympathy; after dreaming about the monkey hitting him he knew how much that could hurt. "Dil, don't copy grandma, okay? I should have used my words but your daddy is very thick-skulled at times." She looked at Stu. "You two are screwing up your relationships with Tommy and if you don't stop you are going to destroy it forever."

"Geez, mom, aren't you exaggerating just a little bit?" Trixie leveled a cool stare at him and Stu smiled sheepishly.

His mother waved her hand dismissively. "If anything I'm not exaggerating enough. Tommy thinks you and Didi only care about Dil and he thinks this little guy, as cute as he is," Dil cooed at that, "doesn't love him and is a bad baby." Dil stopped cooing and lowered his head in shame. "Every time something happens Tommy feels like you take Dil's side and never take his." 

"Oh, that just isn't true," Stu said dismissively.

"The teddy bear?" Trixie said, raising an eyebrow. Dil let out a snort of protest. "Yes, you had it first but how did you get it first? By taking all of Tommy's toys… and those you didn't want you broke. And you could have let it go as you really were done with it but you didn't because you didn't want Tommy to have it." Dil's little shoulders slumped at that as Trixie turned on Stu. "And you… you decided that Tommy should have the bear and what do you do when Dil cries? You cave. You showed Tommy that he can't trust you, that you'll say he gets something but as long as Dil whimpers a bit you'll side with him."

"Well… uh… I mean I gave him the watch and told him about responsibility," Stu exclaimed, puffing up his chest.

"And you said little brothers were a pain that big brothers had to deal with." Dil, hearing that, looked at Stu and squawked in annoyance.

"Me and your Uncle Drew had just fought and… dear god, I'm arguing with an infant."

"blllup," Dil said.

"He said "correction: You are losing an argument to an infant"," Trixie said with a smirk. "He isn't wrong though; Tommy and him were already fighting with each other and you set them up to be adversaries even more. You taught Dil that he can just whine a bit to get his way and taught Tommy he's always going to be second place." 

"I did not teach him that!" Stu protested. "Or… I didn't mean too." He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. "Okay, so I handled that situation wrong… and I'll admit that Deeds and I have been ignoring Tommy because Dil is such a handful-" Dil looked ready to argue that but a look from Trixie had him quickly focus on sucking his fist and trying to look innocent, "-but that doesn't mean I love Tommy any less."

"Stu," Trixie said gently, "there is a reason people say "Actions speak louder than words". Just because you say you love Tommy… when you time and again ignore him because you are focused on Dil that makes him believe that you don't really mean what you are saying." Seeing that she was getting through to him Trixie went for the knockout. "Did you ever feel like your father or I favored Drew over you?"

"No, of course not! Stu said quickly. "You loved us both… and we love you."

"I know, Stu, I know," Trixie said softly, pressing a hand to his cheek. "But even so you still fight with your brother all the time. You two compete and bicker and feud… now imagine Tommy and Dil. Imagine Tommy already starting off envying his brother, jealous of him, feeling like he is the favorite and that no matter what he does you'll side with Dil. Do you want Tommy to avoid Dil?" Both baby and man shook their heads. "Do you want him to hate Dil?" Again, both shook heads. "Do you want Tommy to leave as soon as he can, cutting you all out of his life?" Dil began to cry and Stu felt tears running down his cheeks. "Because he will. Tommy has a big heart but it can only take so much and he is so close to signing all of you off forever. One more hit from a rattle, one more day being made to feel second… and that will be it. You'll lose all the good and wonderful things you could have with him, Stu. A lifetime of being father and son… washed away because you want the baby to stop crying…" she looked at Dil, "because you want to be number 1 all the time. Do you really want that?"

"No," Stu whispered, trembling slightly. "I don't. Mom… what do we do?"

Trixie first looked at Dil. "Well, you need to learn to share and learn how to use words and not rattles. No more hitting Tommy and no more using your sobbing to get your way on everything." Dil hiccupped and nodded. "And you Stu… you need to find a way to show Tommy he is loved… both on his own and with Dil."

"I will mom," Stu promised, shutting his eyes. "I will… I will… I will…"

"Gruuuppp!"

Stu blinked, looking around. The sun was rising and the song birds were beginning to sing. Dil was blinking his eyes, letting out a little yawn, and Stu, as he rubbed his sore neck and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, looked about sadly, wondering if it had all been a dream.

Dil quietly reached out and tapped his hand.

"It doesn't matter if it was or not, buddy," Stu said softly. "I'm going to make this right."

~Later…~

Didi considered the plan Stu had just told her. "Just the Two Of Us Time?"

"Like it? I coined the term myself!" Stu said proudly, sipping on some coffee. "It works like this: one day out of the week you take Tommy and just do something fun, all on your own. Meanwhile I do the same thing with Dil. Then the next day we switch… I get Tommy," he reached over and patted Tommy on the head, his smile faltering slightly when Tommy didn't look up at him with his normal brilliant smile; instead his first born just looked down, focused on his breakfast. Stu winced at that but continued on. "And you get Dil. That way they each get time alone with us. It doesn't have to be anything major… could be just a normal day out getting groceries… but it would be time alone with them until they get used to each other and Tommy and Dil both see that we love them equally."

Didi nodded her head. "I like it, Stu! Not only will it give us some one on one time with the boys but it also will allow us to recharge a bit. No offense, Dilly-willy." Dilly merely sucked on his bottle, though he kept glancing at Tommy. "We won't separate them though all the time… won't help if Dil and Tommy don't get used to each other… but a little time apart won't be a bad thing."

"Great!" Stu paused, considering his words carefully. "So… I was thinking, since you were so worked up last night… maybe…"

Didi leaned over and kissed Stu on the cheek. "I'll take Tommy first. Thank you."

As Tommy watched this he didn't know what to think. The old shoulder seemed to be working faster than expected but he also didn't trust his mommy and daddy yet to keep to their word. They'd gone running to Dil too many times for Tommy to blindly trust them. So he merely kept from looking at them or Dil, ignoring them as he focused on his breakfast.

Dil, meanwhile, kept sneaking glances at Tommy. How was he supposed to get his brother to forgive him if he didn't see him? There had to be a way! He couldn't lose Tommy! He wouldn't! Dil got a determined look on his face…. No matter what happened, no matter what life threw at him, he would prove to his big brother he was a good baby and-

"Sniff… uh, Deeds? I think Dil needs a change." Stu stood up and freed Dil from his seat.

Dil pouted. Foiled again.

~MC~MC~MC~

Author's Notes: So, I've gotten one or two PMs that I want to answer here. First, no, I don't have an OC. Never even thought about it. I guess this is a thing in this fandom but quite frankly I wrote this story spur of the moment.

Second, have been asked where I see the main characters as adults... careers, family, so on. So what follows is my personal opinion, based not on any fanon ideas, of where they would be.

Starting with Phil, I see him retaining his love for the disgusting and icky. While his friends grow out of looking at bugs and mud Phil still would love these things, only for it to go from mere "those are gross!" to, "Wow, there is a ton of interesting stuff!" Betty, observing this, would end up getting Phil a lot of science books, microscopes, and stuff like that as he got older for his birthday and Christmas. This would lead him to get doctrines in entomology, botany and mineralogy. He went on several trips around the world, including South America and Asia, but Phil felt that there was still plenty to learn in the good ol' US of A. He would later prove this by writing a book about mud that became vogue in mineralogy circles. At first planning to become a professor at his alma mater (UCLA), Phil's life would take a different path thanks to Lil...

Lil would struggle as a teen, feeling at times like she wanted to break away from her tom boy persona that plagued her in youth, while at other times rebelling that just because she was a girl she had to be a fairy princess (not that her parents thought this but too much of the world did). This would all change during a school lockdown in her junior year when a deranged man entered her high school with a gun. The man was taken down by a tough female detective who body tackled him and beat him to a pulp when he tried to grab Lil to use her as a hostage. When Lil later met the detective at a dinner the school threw to thank the police for their help Lil saw this stern and strong detective could also be an elegant beauty that, in Betty's words "cleaned up real nice!". Thus, Lil decided there was a way to be a girl and be tough and after high school entered college to get a degree in criminal justice. She never walked the beat, however, as in college she was recruited by the FBI, who were impressed by her determination and her wits (her earlier years scheming with Phil, Tommy, and the rest to escape and go on adventures helped her put herself in the shoes of criminals on the run). Lil became the FBI's best manhunt expert and when she became a Special Agent at the FBI's LA branch tasked with creating a manhunt task force her first hire was her brother Phil, who used his knowledge of bugs and dirt to determine prior movements of suspects to help determine their boltholes. They, along with their team, became the bane of fugitives everywhere and the team had a 95% success rate.

Phil eventually married another member of the team, an ME named Gina, and they currently they have two children: an almost 3 year old son named Benny and a 8 month old named Petey.

Lil, on the other hand, has had a bit more of a rocky lovelife, going through men like they were napkins at a fast food joint, but always circled back to her on again, off again romantic partner, a Prosecutor for the federal government that works with her team named Langdon. They are not married but live together and Lil would be, at the time of writing this, pregnant with their first child, a little girl they plan to name Clair (who currently wishes mommy would stop running around as it made things bouncy).

Angelica's life also went on a different path during her teen years, but for a different reason... though like Lil it involved the law. The night of her prom Angelica, after fighting with her date, stole his car and went on a joyride that ended with her doing some damage in the down town. The judge showed leniency and only gave her community service: 400 hours worked at a hospital for sick kids. Assigned to work with the toddlers and babies, Angelica quickly saw the pain these little ones went through and one day but worse how bored they could get in the same room day after day, playing with the same toys. At the spur of the moment she began to tell them funny stories about her cousin Tommy and the adventures he had with his friends when they were babies. While many nurses told Angelica that the children were simply too young to understand she believed differently and continued to work with the kids, treating them with maturity and respect. Even after her service hours were completed she continued to work at the hospital and began to help get new toys, books, and clothing for the kids. When she graduated from high school she got a degree in business and, with the help of her mother and Kira, both of whom had great business sense, set up the "Little Angels Foundation", a non-profit which worked to help stimulate the minds of infants and toddlers not only in hospitals but those that were at risk or in poor neighborhoods. This included helping to raise money for free daycares for working mothers, playgrounds built where abandoned lots had been, getting educational shows to stream for free, and working with hospitals to better make their recovery areas more baby-friendly and entertaining. She was aided in this by her unlikely partner...

...Chuckie Finster had always been a late bloomer. He didn't talk till he was well past two, he always hung out with younger kids, and he seemed to be rather awkward no matter his age. This all changed the summer before his junior year. A growth spurt, the removal of his braces, and the kindness of a gym teacher who had himself been a 'string bean who tripped over his own feet' saw Chuckie transform from the nerdy and awkward teen into a lean and built young man who finally grew into his frame and form. The last two years of high school saw Chuckie become one of the most popular and sought after teens in school and he flourished at last, culminating in him being award Prom King. But just because he suddenly went from Zero to Hero didn't mean he'd forgotten who he had been. Quite the opposite... many people, even years later, would speak of how when they were scared freshmen Chuck Finster would come up, shake their hand, and tell them it was okay to be scared. He became a friend to all and with his best friend Tommy Pickles their high school saw bullying complaints drop to near zero. Those he helped in turn helped others and even now their old high school has an informal program that sees seniors assisting freshmen.

Graduating valedictorian of his class, Chuckie went to medical school and got a degree in child psychology. He remembered well the fears he and his friends had suffered in their youth as well as what it was like to suddenly go from the scared one to the cool one. Dr. Finster became within two years the leading expect on child raising (to the point that even Didi tosses away her old baby books, declaring them trash when compared to 'Chuck's brilliant ideas') and was sought out by many groups... but when Angelica Pickles called upon him and, in a show of new found humility, asked for his help in designing a daycare for toddlers that had come from abusive homes Chuckie quickly signed on... and then signed on for the next project... and the next. He eventually became a full time member of "Little Angels" and two year ago he and Angelica, to the shock of everyone, out of the blue announced they had eloped over the weekend and no Angelica didn't care what you thought, shut up. They currently have a nearly two year old daughter named Melinda (after Chuckie's mom) who spends much of her days playing between their desks at their headquarters; Melinda is also a Mini-Psychoologist (her term) who comforts new friends and settles disagreements amount other babies who play at the nonprofit. Chuckie and Angelica also collaborated on two parenting books: "Dumb Babies: Destroying the Myths of the First Two Years" which postulated babies being far more aware than people realized, and "A Big Brave Dog" designed to help parents aid their children with their fears.

Chuckie's sister, Kimi, didn't have anything radical happen to her that altered her destiny. Rather, she quite happily looked to her role models (namely her mother and, to a lesser degree, Susie and Angelica), to determine her path. By the time she was 16 Kimi could speak 4 languages (Japanese, English, and to the surprise of her mother the tot had picked up French during their short time there; she learned Spanish for her foreign language credit to 'challenge' herself). Kimi forgoed college for a year to work as an intern in New York at a fashion catalog/magazine publisher but halfway through what was supposed to be a low-paying job answering calls and getting coffee Kimi's boss ran into issues with a designer from France. Kimi quickly stepped in, figuring out where the breakdown in communication was and also explained why the artist's designs would work in Paris but not for a women in New York. Within a week Kimi was transferred to the buyer department and soon had her own section in the magazine, writing articles about the next big trend. Kimi, used to travel, began to roam the world, seeking out little known villages and people and sending back clothing and jewelry they designed to be sold in high end fashion stores while also writing about it for the magainze. She always made sure to clue Lil, Angelica, and Susie in on what was about to be the next big thing. She did this on her own for about five years until she bumped into some old friends...

For two brothers who started off on such rocky ground by the time they graduated college Tommy and Dil were the best of friends. While some thought that Dil might have a learning disability or be a crazed dreamer who couldn't focus Tommy knew that his brother just had a different way of learning and encouraged him to do it his way. Only Tommy wasn't surprised when Dil graduated second in his grade and was offered scholarships to several prestigious schools. Dil, however, had other plans. He knew if it weren't for his brother he wouldn't be the young man he was and he decided that he would help Tommy achieve his dreams. Dil got in contact with Nigel Thornberry, the famous documentary star, who they had met as babies and stayed in contact over the years. Nigel's daughters were going in different directions than him (his oldest hitting on the tech boom and designing cheap but well bought apps while the younger became a vet who worked at the San Diego zoo, designing better habitats to promote the comfort of animals) and he himself was getting too old to continue his show. Thus, two years into film school, Tommy got a call from Nigel: He had seen some of Tommy's work (thanks to Dil) and he wanted Tommy to come work for him. The plan became for Tommy to be his cameraman for a year, learning the ropes, then for Nigel to retire and Tommy to take over the show. Tommy accepted only if Dil, who at this point he'd realized had played a major role in preparing all this, could join too, acting as a boom operator. Nigel accepted.

Dil joining Tommy turned out to be more perfect than any could have imagined. Nigel quickly saw the chemistry the two young men had and he hit upon a brilliant idea: a travel show where Tommy and Dil would journey across the globe with Tommy focusing on history while Dil discussed folklore and legend. The first batch of episodes, filmed in Africa, became a smash hit and Nigel's show became 'Into The Unknown With the Pickle Brothers'. Nigel remained a producer, he and his wife traveling with the Pickles but able to enjoy relaxing days on the beach while the boys hiked the jungles. They hired a crew to assist with sound and camera work, Tommy did the editing, and Dil discovered that he had a great talent for research, becoming the team's go-to for quick data.

It was in year two of their show that Tommy and Dil ran into Kimi in Thailand. Tommy insisted that Kimi join them for a special segment and Kimi, while at first a touch awkward while on camera, quickly blossomed. Her segment, on the culture of the people of Thailand, only made the show more successful and Nigel contacted Kimi's publisher to arrange a collaboration. In exchange for Kimi hosting the show and advertising the magazine the magazine would, in turn, advertise the show and run articles about it. The show, its title shortened to just "Into the Unknown", is now a cultural phenomena watched by parents and kids alike. It would feature all three grown Rugrats picking a new place to visit with Tommy discussing history, Dil legends and myths, and Kimi the culture.

Tommy and Kimi, spending more and more time together, eventually fell in love and got married while waiting for the rains to stop in a little village in Borneo. They have a son, Louie, who has just turned 1, and are trying for another baby. Dil is currently engaged to their camerawoman, Steph, and is the stepfather to her 18 month old son Brian.

Suzie remained wise beyond her years and thus it should come to little surprise that she is currently the Senator of California. Her husband, Gabe, is a stay at home dad who produces his own music and takes care of their twin daughters Jen and Gwen. Suzie is an independent who has already become well known for brokering deals between feuding Senators. Rumor has it that both sides are courting her to run for President when she turns 35…

Reptar remained a favorite of Tommy's generation even though the show ended years ago. New versions, including ones that featured Reptar as a superhero, Reptar as a robot (a good one), and of course 'Baby Reptar Adventures', come out every few years but the fans still love Generation One Reptar. Last year Nichael May produced a live action Reptar movie... though the critics panned it as mindless action and explosions the film grossed a billion dollars. Tommy has seen it twenty times, despite living in a jungle or a desert for much of its theatrical run. A crossover with the recent big screen adaptation of Goober, entitled Reptar v. Goober: Dawn of Heroics, will be coming out next year.

To be honest, after writing this all out… I knida want to write up this adult Rugrats with Generation 2 story. The basic idea would be that something causes the scattered Rugrats to decide to get together again… maybe Charlotte is retiring or Kiri wins an award for her coffee shop? I don't know, but they would decide to fly out to meet each other. We'd first get stuff in their normal lives, both from their point of view and from their kids. Then, when they met, we'd see the gang together while their kids would meet and have Rugrats adventures, forcing the grown up cast to chase after them. I see it in the same vein as the Power Rangers comedy epic "Of Love and Bunnies" where the first rangers and the then current rangers go to Power Rangers Day which becomes a giant reunion with jokes and misunderstandings and love. What are your thoughts? I know you guys love this story but at this point we are moving into the fluff where I can just write whenever I have an idea (first new chapter? A story to counter the dark comedy fic 'Bread' which is just sweet Tommy and Didi fun) while this would be more serialized. Thoughts?


	5. Chapter 5

Didi looked over at Tommy, forcing a smile on her face at the sight of him just sitting there, listlessly running his finger through a few droplets of milk that had fallen on his highchair's tray. Seeing him like this and remembering how he had been only a few months earlier, cooing and giggling and full of energy... it was like an icy shock to her soul. There was something just so wrong about Tommy being quiet... not that he'd been a difficult baby, sobbing at the slightest thing like Dil. Tommy had always been so good, his screeching fits lasting only a few moments most times. The last time she could remember him being truly upset and there being nothing she could do was when Spike had run away. And even then it had been more of him being quiet and withdrawn than screaming his little lungs apart. But he was always quick to bounce back, to go from screaming to soft whimpers and then comforted coos.

As she cleaned up the kitchen Didi realized that her experience with Tommy had colored her actions towards Dil. She could see now that Dil was just a fussy baby, one who cried at the slightest discomfort. He was high maintenance... though she would never given him up for anything. But she and Stu had been so used to Tommy, who only cried when something was seriously wrong, and thus assumed that every whimper from Dil was one that was trying to alert her to an emergency. Her nightmare and the cold light of the day of how she'd neglected her first born helped her see the truth: Dil wasn't Tommy and it wasn't fair to either of them to treat them as such. She was doing Dil no favors coddling him just as she did Tommy no favors focusing so much energy on the newest Pickle.

If she were truly honest Dil was more like Angelica than he was Tommy. Didi remembered her and Stu babysitting Angelica a few times when the little girl had been a few months old and she'd cried whenever she wanted attention… and she always wanted it. If her or Stu weren't looking at her she'd let loose a screech only to calm down the moment she got their attention again, giving them a gummy smile and flapping her arms. Dil wasn't quite the drama queen Angelica was... it was more that Dil lacked any sense of patience while Tommy seemed embarrassed at times that he'd let something get to him and cause him to cry.

"Hmmm... I wonder what Lipschitz has to say about that," Didi murmured to herself as she finished cleaning off the table. While part of her wanted to rush to her precious baby books and check to see about the different ways infants would cry she knew right now the only place she wanted and needed to be was with Tommy.

Looking at him again made her instantly scrap any plans to treat today as same-old, same old. But she didn't want to go over the top; it just felt wrong to, for example, go to an amusement park or go on a spending spree at a candy shop. That just felt like her trying to buy back Tommy's love and she simply didn't want to do that. Besides, this was supposed to be about her creating a new normal, showing Tommy that just because there was a new baby in the house that didn't mean he'd be abandoned. Doing something wild and crazy wouldn't help and neither would just going through the motions of a normal day.

Racking her brain to think of what she and Tommy could do that would be special without going overboard, Didi glanced over at the counter and suddenly memories of her as a little girl with her mother in the kitchen sprang to mind. One particular ritual pushed ahead of the others, one that even to this day made her smile and feel loved, and she knew that she'd found her answer.

"Alright Tommy... I think today we should do something a bit different." The baby looked at her for a moment before his eyes slid back down to the highchair tray. Didi didn't let this get to her, as she knew that she was dealing with a tough crowd and would need to win the 1-year old over. "First mommy needs to get everything ready!" Didi began to hum to herself as she moved about the kitchen, opening cabinets and pulling out different bowls, cups, and ingredients.

Tommy, for his part, subtly watched his mother work, still giving her the old shoulder. He'd been waiting for her to set him in his playpen, leaving him alone while she cleaned the house. Tommy had been looking forward to some time to himself, as he'd planned to go about the playpen and hide his toys so Dil couldn't take any more of them and break them. Yes, his mommy had put his teddy bear back in his crib, but Tommy knew it would only take one crying fit for his mommy and daddy to give back the bear to Dil... and probably Tommy's jammies and diapie too if Dil wanted it. But they couldn't take things if he hid them and while Dil was loud and smelly and could throw things he couldn't walk around as good as Tommy. That meant he could hide toys in his special spots and Dil would never get them. Tommy also thought he should begin hiding bottles too; memories of Dil drinking the last drop of milk from the bottle when they were in the forest filled his little mind.

But his mommy hadn't put him in the playpen. Instead she left him in his highchair, saying they were doing something 'different' and then moving about grabbing bowls and cups and stuff. Tommy tried to figure out what she was doing. It was too early for her to make her and daddy their lunches so why was she getting things out to make food? Was she making something else? Something for Dil?

Tommy swallowed as he suddenly remembered the story his g'ampa had told him a few weeks ago during one of Dil's rare quiet naps. It was about two little spwouts named Hamsil and Grebbel who had wandered into the forest and ended up at a gingerb'ead house that was home to a witch. The tot's eyes widened as his mommy began to murmur a spell as she grabbed a bag of white powder...

 _"Heeheehee!" his mommy cackled, dressed no longer in her normal dress but instead in a black witch's cloak and a pointy hat. The kitchen had suddenly transformed, looking like the gingerbread house from the story book and while any other time this would have been wonderful the dark lighting and the way his mommy was laughing didn't make him feel happy in the slightest with the change. Tommy struggled to get out of his highchair but the moment he lifted his arms up magic bands popped out and grabbed onto his wrists, pulling him tighter against the hard plastic. His mommy rubbed her hands together, her eyes gleaming like Angelica's when she spotted a big piece of yummy cake. "Oh, you've come along quite well, my pretty!" his mommy hissed, a wicked grin flashing on her lips as she leaned in close. "Oh yes, nice and plump!" she reached down and poked his tummy; not the fun way that made him giggled but hard enough to make him wince and tears to pool in the corner of his eyes. "I've fattened you up nicely and now it is time at last to finish your baking!"_

 _She reached into her magic bag and pulled out a handful of white powder. She brought her hand to him, the powder resting in her palm, before she blew, sending the magic dust all over him! Tommy let out a gasp as it covered his skin and suddenly he felt funny. It was like when Angelica had left the window open and he'd gotten all sick; his tummy was all twisty and his head hurt and arms and legs felt heavy but this time mommy and daddy weren't there to make him feel better; they'd never make him feel better again..._

 _His mommy cackled once more as the bands that were holding him released him and Tommy quickly freed himself and fell to the floor with an 'oompf!'. But when he tried to walk he found himself stumbling... everything felt so weird! He looked down at his legs and gasped; rather than his cute chubby legs and tiny feet with even tinier toes his legs were pillars of dough! He raised his hands up and saw his fingers were gone too and his arms had become dough as well. He ran over to a mirror that was set up near the hall, leaving sticky footprints as he toddled along, and stared at himself in horror. He wasn't Tommy anymore... the magic powder had turned him into a cookie! He had a cookie face and candy eyes and a frosting mouth! He backed away in horror only for his mommy to lift him up. But she wasn't cuddling him so he'd feel better... she was taking him to the oven!_

 _"Just a few minutes and my special Tommy Cookie will be complete!" his mommy laughed even as Tommy struggled. "And then Dilly will finally get his yummy treat!"_

 _Tommy looked over his mommy's shoulder and saw Dil sitting on the table, also wearing a black witch's hat and a black onsie, a knife and fork in his hands. "Tommy cookie! Tommy cookie!" Dil chanted._

 _"Uh, I don't think you want to cook me... I hear I taste te'ibbles! Like... uh... daddy's socks!" When his mother did not relent Tommy panicked. "No!" Tommy cried out. "I don't wanna be a cookie! Don't eat me! Dilly! Mommy!"_

 _"Hey Deed, have you seen the remote?" his daddy asked as he walked into the kitchen. He was dressed the exact same save for a witch's hat he wore as well._

 _His mommy sighed, her voice reverting to normal. "It's on the table by the door, Stu. Now please, I'm trying to cook Tommy."_

 _"Oh, right. Thanks Didi! Bye champ...I bet you taste delicious!"_

 _Tommy screamed as his mommy went back to her evil laughing, throwing open the door of the oven, heat blasting his face as she moved to toss him in, and Tommy sobbed in terror as she shut the door-_

"Tommy! Tommy, it's okay!"

Tommy hiccupped, realizing that it'd been all in his head. He hadn't noticed that he'd been crying or that his mommy had picked him up and was cradling him, stroking his back as he sobbed. He forgot all about giving her the old shoulder and pressed his face against her shoulder, little sobs running through his frame. It had felt so real…

"It's okay, sweetie, I just stepped into the pantry to grab some sugar. It's okay." Didi hugged him tight, rocking him back and forth. She'd been so startled when she'd heard his sobs and when she'd found him Tommy had been practically trembling, he'd been crying so hard. She mentally cursed herself; he was dealing with abandonment issues and she'd walked away. For only a second, yes, but that had been enough to frighten him. Running her hands along his back as he burrowed his little face against her shoulder Didi began to hum as she continued moving about the kitchen, wanting to be ready when Tommy calmed down.

After a few minutes Tommy's tears subsided and he let go of his mommy's shirt, looking around. The kitchen looked like a kitchen again and his mommy was dressed normal too. She wasn't laughing or rubbing her hands together... she was just holding him like she'd used to when he was a little little baby and scared. He sniffed, pressing his face to her shoulder, savoring the brief moment of love. He knew that it wouldn't last, that she was only hugging him cuss Dil wasn't around, so he'd get as much of the love as he could before she took it away.

As much as Didi wanted to savor the simple feeling of her baby hugging her for comfort she knew she needed to keep going, to show him that she was worthy of such comfort. So as Tommy calmed down she went back to her ingredients, getting everything ready with one hand while holding him with the other.

Tommy finally, with a hiccup, stopped crying and looked to see what his mommy was doing. He saw that the magic powder wasn't being used on him but was instead being added to a mixing bowl along with a bunch of other things like sugar and salt. His mommy set him down on the counter and Tommy watched, fascinated, as she opened a small envelope and poured it into the sticky mixture. It kinda looked like lumpy playdoh but all white and boring. He looked up at his mommy, wondering if she was making him boring clay to replace his toys that belonged to Dil now. That kinda made sense… Dil wouldn't even want something so boring.

"Now we let the dough rise and then we can make Tommy Bread." The baby's eyes widened in horror but Didi, who didn't notice his panic, spoke before he could begin scrambling away. "Yup, yummy bread just for Tommy!"

Just... for Tommy? As in only for him. Like... his mommy was making him something that no one else could have? Something yummy? Not for Dilly or daddy or g'andpa or anyone… all for him? Tommy looked up at his mother, eyes wide, before he looked down at the weird gooey stuff. On second thought maybe he didn't want… whatever this was supposed to be.

But she didn't give him the bowl to begin eating, however. Instead she put a towel over it and set it on the oven before walking back to him, picking him up and, thankfully, taking him away from the oven and into the living room. She sat down on the couch and Tommy's mouth made a little 'o' when she clicked on the TV and found some cartoons. It was daddy who watched cartoons with him… usually mommy said they were bad for babies, something about scarying him, but he never got that because he wasn't scared of anything on the telebision! Yet she sat there and let him watch all his favorite cartoons, sometimes rubbing his back, other times wiggling his arms and legs during the commercials, but for the most part just letting he enjoy it. It was peaceful… restful… and the next thing Tommy knew he was curled up against his mommy's chest, her heartbeat lulling him into a nice quick nappie. No nightscares came and instead he just took his nappie, waking up after what felt like days (but was really just minutes) as his mommy carried him into the kitchen and brought the bowl over for him to see.

Tommy was amazed… the weird dough was all squishy and big now, looking like a little pillow. He reached out only to stop, nervous. He didn't want to get in trouble for touching it… he still wasn't for sure what mommy would do.

"It's okay, sweetheart," Didi said gently, tapping the bread dough herself to prove to him it was okay. Tommy tentively patted the dough… and then giggled and slapped it a bit more firmly. "See, nothing to be scared off. Just the dough that is going to become your bread." Didi pulled off a small piece and handed it to Tommy, letting him squish it and squeeze it in his little fist while she kneaded the much bigger lump. "We're going to make some nice bread and put all sorts of yummy butters and jammies on it for your lunch."

Tommy wasn't sure why they were putting the bread in jammies… unless it needed a nap… but he soon forgot about that and focused on playing with the lump of dough. It was fun to pull and smoosh and his mommy didn't mind what he did with it. He even licked it once and she merely laughed and told him it was okay but the cooked stuff would taste better.

By the time it was ready to go in the oven Tommy had completely forgotten about giving his mommy the old shoulder and squealed happily when she picked him up and took him back in the living room to play. He forgot about Dil and feeling sad and how lonely it had been… all he thought about was how much fun he was having and how he wanted to try the bread with his mommy and how great the day was.

Didi, unbeknownst to him, was thinking the same thing.

~MC~MC~MC~

Author's Note: This chapter is my 'correcting' of the black comedy fic "Bread" by insanitarium. For those that haven't read it the fic takes place from Tommy's POV. Didi snaps, kills Stu (he is sleeping in ketchup as Tommy thinks) and then throws him in the oven and kills him. Yes, a very dark fic with black humor. But as others said, its summary sounds like fluff and I decided to do the real thing… with Tommy only dreaming he ended up in the oven.

If you haven't checked out my other Rugrats Story, make sure to read and review Reunion, which has the Rugrats as adults with their own babies meeting up after years apart and once more going on silly adventures.


End file.
